"Below are 10 things I have learned most in leadership:

1. I will never know everything. 

2. I will never turn down an opportunity to learn. 

2. People shall always be put over programs.

3. My mistakes are learning opportunities. 

4. Leadership begins when I can let go of myself, and allow God to lead through me. 

5. My integrity carries more weight than my gifting. 

6. The day I stop learning is the day I should stop leading.

7. I can always learn from the people around me. (No matter their title) 

8. It is vital for me to have older/wiser accountability. (Someone who’s been doing this longer than me.)

9. The way I respond to destruction carries more weight than the way I respond to victory. 

10. The way I live my everyday life is just as important as the way I lead a team or group. (If not more) 

I hope these values pierce your heart the way they have pierced mine. These are not the only values necessary for the life of a leader, but I believe they are definitely a good start.

- Jarrid Wilson"

Where there is love..

teaching him ways of becoming a bright young man one day

bahahahaha

I love home.

I'm praying for you.

My dad may not be the easiest person to get along with. He grumbles and complains aloud whenever he feels shortchanged. He scolds and corrects the wrongs, right in people's faces. He gets straight to the point.

His temper may get the best of him most of the time but I thank God that my parents are married to each other. Why? Because where my dad isn't able, my mum is. Where he loses control, my mum is able to keep her cool and think and act with a clear head. 

Both of them are stubborn people. But that didn't stop them from coming together to talk about it like grown-ups after each conflict. It takes extraordinary Power to pull two people who easily repels each other back together. I admire my dad most when he can admit his wrongs and put down his 'man pride' to apologize. To his wife and to his children. He might not be ready to forgive many other things, but I'm praying every time that I can, that God will keep softening his heart day by day. Let the revelation of His love come to him that he'll one day fully let God to help him forgive. 

Forgiveness is what everyone needs because everyone makes mistakes. It might be easy for him to find forgiveness where there is mutual love, like in a family. It's hard to open up for healing to take place in certain areas though, when anger and pride has the upper hand in it. By himself, it is next to impossible to let that happen. But when he has seen and believed what God had done to forgive the ugly sins of human, I believe it will make him know that it's only natural and right to forgive others. 

So here's my prayer, that God's love will change him. For no one does a better 'heart surgery' than He does. I hope to see him becoming a Godly father by God's strength. And I will give my best to support and encourage him whenever I can. I pray that you will love God with all your heart again, Pa. Let him hold and control your life and see His wonders unfold. You can do it, Pa. You can do it.

It seems impossible but it really is true.

"When God's love demonstrated by Jesus becomes the deepest awareness of yourself --- that you are justified, accepted, and approved, and that you are a child of God --- when this truth falls into you, displacing all other definitions of yourself, then your identity is in Jesus and you are set free. You are not who you were. You are a new creation. You are the righteousness of God in Christ."

Buses and Family.

I was rather disappointed that the bus driver did not stop directly at pudu station again yesterday (not the first time)
and not only that, it was a completely new place to me where we ended up
after getting very brief directions from the driver on where to head to for the nearest LRT station
i got on my way and ventured on a completely new route back to PJ.
It just seems like I always have the privilege to gain new experiences this way. hahaha. so thankful.

Experienced Dad's protection over me throughout the trip back.
He sheltered me by stopping the rain exactly the time that I needed to get off for toilet break
while the minute before that I kept wondering if I should take an umbrella with me to go down
the rain poured once I got under the roofs
when I was done at the washroom
the rain stopped again, long enough for me to get back into the bus. safe and dry.
it's just through these little things that He do for me that fills my heart with great warmth.

today is my Ma and Pa's 20th anniversary too!
since I was home and lil bro had yet to begin his UPSR exam, we had a little celebration together last Sunday at a fancy restaurant.
They had had exciting years together, not to mention the additional joy due to the presence of their amazinggg kids :D
I'm deeply grateful and happy for this bond we share -- the way we laugh and joke, the way we are quiet too, and the way we understand.
Keep us growing stronger in Your love that wraps around us, God. Thank you for the times we can have together :)

Blessed 912 !

one of those moments

"We tend to judge others by their behavior and ourselves by our intentions." ---Albert F. Schlieder

Hmm..

it's not the end!

do not grow weary in waiting.
do not give up hope in God halfway through the race
because God isn't finish with what He's doing for and in You
the promises and rewards are only for those who faithfully finishes until the finish line
they will not fade, they will not be claimed by someone else.
because God will personally bless those as He has promised since the beginning



one of my favourite promises of God
:)

Isaiah 40:31
³¹ but those who hope in the Lord
    will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
    they will run and not grow weary,
    they will walk and not be faint.

I never truly set aside time to look back and count the amazing things Dad has done for me
I give thanks as I go.
after each prayer answered, after each road made smooth and obstacle moved out the way, I thank Him.
and many times they are forgotten very quickly. especially if they are small ones :p
but I would very much like to start now.

as soon as today began, I could already feel Him from the start.
on my way to the washroom I saw the uni janitors that I always do and never bothered to take a second look at, today I did.
she was struggling to pour the trash from the bin to another bigger plastic bag. 
it was hard to do it alone since the plastic bag wasn't really cooperating with her. lol.
unusually, I walked over to her side and held the plastic bag open for her.
She looked up to me, stunned for a second, and shyly smiled with all her teeth at me. 
I couldn't find the words to say so I just smiled back.
She managed to pour most of the rubbish in in just 15 seconds. 
I regretted not helping her all the way since she warmly said she could take it from there.
She thanked me and I walked off.
Did i made a difference? i wonder. lol.
but I thought, if I could just notice them and help them out more, the work they do will be so much easier.
they clean our campus, wash the bathrooms, make sure the bins are always empty, 
the least I could do is smile and thank them.

on a different note,
working on this HOA assignment has really made me dig up old testament stories kao kao. lol.
how the artist interprets and tells the story. versus how the story really goes.
I'm also thankful that its a channel for me to share about God. muhaha. 
as i explain about the story of the painting of The Prodigal Son to this friend of mine, i sneaked in some other stories as well and got her questioning. 
if it weren't for the extra time we had staying back after class,
I wouldn't have known about this part of her past. 
I hope to humbly shine some light of Dad into her life
hopefully she will begin to see.

children of the light, we have nothing to fear :)
every darkness trembles at the sound of His name.
I am very very able because of His mightiness!
:)


called to be like Him

Philippians 2:3-11

³ Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves,⁴ not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.

⁵ In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus:

⁶ Who, being in very nature^[a] God, 

    did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage;

⁷ rather, he made himself nothing 
    by taking the very nature^[b] of a servant,     being made in human likeness. 

⁸ And being found in appearance as a man,

    he humbled himself

    by becoming obedient to death —

        even death on a cross!

⁹ Therefore God exalted him to the highest place
    and gave him the name that is above every name, 
¹⁰ that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, 
    in heaven and on earth and under the earth, 
¹¹ and every tongue acknowledge that Jesus Christ is Lord, 
    to the glory of God the Father.

My little spring in the dessert :)


I am so easily discouraged by my bad attempts in drawing/designing
I see no use in continuing it if I don't see that it will become a good result in the end
simply because I'm tired of trying so hard
but I press on nonetheless
"you can do it you can do it. Just do your best and I'll be your support. don't look down on yourself."

why?
because
Isaiah 40:29-32
²⁹ He gives strength to the weary 
    and increases the power of the weak.
³⁰ Even youths grow tired and weary,
    and young men stumble and fall; 
³¹ but those who hope in the Lord    
    will renew their strength. 
They will soar on wings like eagles; 
    they will run and not grow weary,
    they will walk and not be faint. 

if you're tired in trying, just keep hoping in God. Trust and lean. hands off any other support. trust in only Him alone.

How silly I am and how mighty He is.


¹ If you love learning, you love the discipline that goes with it— how shortsighted to refuse correction! Proverbs 12:1

I came to this verse right after I had my little conflict with a friend.
it was more to my self pride and weakness in abiding the formats that made me stumble.
but I held bitterness in my heart and it showed through and maybe somehow hurt her too.
she corrected me. in the gentlest way possible.
but all i could hear was what a bad job i did.
i blamed myself and resented that she pointed it out.

then the warfare of the good and bad battled inside me.
let go. no. let go. no. let go. no. no. no.
but i thank God so much, that His spirit in me is stronger. and He won.
I got over it with the comfort God brought to me.
somehow i still feel bad for acting the way i did. childishly. 

and when i came home and sat down with my odj and bible, He began to speak.
and the verse above was what He showed me. how can it be so timely?
love and peace just washed over me and I was instantly lifted up.
I yearned for Him to forgive me and thanked Him at the same time. this time, He corrected me too.
I knew what i had to do. I had to clear all the confusion away. 
so i texted her and let her know i was sorry for the way i behaved. and she replied me in a joyful lighthearted way. I am so relieved :)

God is my ultimate comforter and healer. all the time.
and today my mighty Dad demonstrated His amazing timing once more as I was having time clashes for consultation and a replacement test.
long story short, I had replacement test half an hour before an important consultation with my tutor. 
i can only make it if i finished my essay assesment in half an hour's time lol which is completely impossible.
but i just surrendered to Dad and LEANED ON HIM.
i said, "i don't know how You're gonna do it, but i trust that You will."
this morning my tutor texted my friend saying, 
"sorry no time. you'll just have to find time to consult me next week."
PRAISE GOD!! WHOA!
i just couldn't giving Him thanks and knew i could sit for my test peacefully. 

He's so great.
I had pretty good grades for the assignments i got back today. all glory to Him and Him aloneeeee.
I know i'm in good hands. I just know it.
:)

well taken care of (:


Entering the final few weeks of the first trimester already,
and i'm still very much alive! praise God!

so much has happened, so little has been recorded down. i feel a bit sad.
but however i still wake up grateful about everything that has happened.
i'm doing what i've always wanted to, and definitely there will be times where I struggle to finish an assignment, but at the end of the day, I see the purpose for all my works and know I've not worked in vain :)

truly its the most hectic course for a university student. GRAPHIC DESIGNNN.
and i'm so so so THANKFUL for the amazing help i get from my amazing seniors,
namely tammie, ah yew and terry.
i really appreciate u guys so much. all the spiritual support and prayers and guidance.
I'm so new to this and your support is simply gold to me.
just wanna let u know, if u're reading this, i'm so thankful!!

and also!
I'm now in my first ever experience of fasting and praying. YAY! :D
personally, i think i made a good decision in setting aside everything to simply fast and pray.
I never saw the importance in practicing this, but ever since i said to myself, "why not give it a try", Dad truly showed me greater and wonderful things in earnestly praying for our country.
it feels so good after each time. even though i'm only fasting for dinner everyday.
some other changes i've noticed also is how much more free time i have!
cutting out the time used for travelling in and out and eating and chatting.
i even have spare time to clean and organize my room!
happy lor :D
God is good yeah!

room had been decorated ever since tam's birthday too. thanks to her deep passion for fairy lights and ah yew's great generosity in blessing us with hers, we got to hang fairy lights all over our room!

u can also catch a glimpse of my VERY CLEAN fan, much thanks to ah yew for being so helpful. puts me to shame!

so anyway just a short update.

keep doing what u do and do it great!

God will forever be faithful!

till next time.

:)

I know i've been busy lately
and even now I am too. bahahah
but I just decided to steal a little time to share this video here


click this link
The lost thing


lecturer showed this animation during class today and I was just deeply touched
lost with words
what a timely reminder


in the midst of this endless cycle of workload after workload
have u lost something along the way?
the golden tint of joy or the simple gratitudes or the value for our most precious things in life
is it still with u now?
or has it been erased off from all the frictions caused by the many activities that's been placed in ur life
whether u asked for it or not.


now is probably the time to find it back
:)

"Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs in the kingdom of heaven." Matthew 5:3


What a crazy big and wonderful promise!
:D


Our Dad's kingdom.
how about that.


I wanna be vulnerable and weak in You for my every today
be filled by Your strength from above 
it is only in You I will truly be strong.

But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. 2 Cor 12:9


AMEN! :D

Does it even matter? Yes.




Beloved

adjective

1.

greatly loved; dear to the heart.

noun

2.

a person who is greatly loved.

Ephesians 1:3-14
In Him, we were chosen before the foundation of the world, that we would be holy and blameless before Him.
In Love, we were predestined to be adopted as children through Jesus Christ to God.
In Him, we were ransomed through Christ's blood.
In Him, we were forgiven of our trespasses according to the riches of His grace, which He lavished on us.
In Him, we were made known to the mystery of His will.
In Him, we have obtained an inheritance that have been determined beforehand.
In Him, we, who had listened and believed, were sealed with the Holy Spirit of promise as God's own possession, to the praise of His glory.


now replace all the 'we' as your own name.
and read it aloud. 


do you know who you are?
do you know who you are to God?
but then again, does it even matter what God thinks of me?


yes, it does.
it matters a lot.
why would He even go through all the trouble just to save the helpless us?
why would anyone do that?


the answer is simple.
because you are His beloved.
dear to the heart.
and greatly loved.
don't you ever think any lesser of yourself.
you belong to Him and He. loves. you.
and that fact will never change.
:)

OI ASK ME LA

"Question your lecturers! Question the way things are run. Question your education. Question the information you receive. Don't just sit and take it all in. This is your education and I want you to argue with me. I'll grade you up for doing so. Spark my thinking!"

so many new things.

i'm loving this History of Arts class already! :D

the 8th of june and beyond.


i'm so exhausted. and worn out. and broke. 
but all because i've had such an awesome time spent with u all
each and everyone of u who put in effort to give me those surprises 
and and all those gifts received
my thank you goes out to all of you for more than just your presents and presences.
i'm deeply grateful!


sorry, i've no pictures LOL 
but we really took some pretty crazy amazing pictures
hahahh :D
I'm grateful to my heavenly Dad that i could share this day with you guys


YAM SENG TO BEING 19TH!

Organize me.

No idea why i've been so blur and forgetful and.. basically just not in the situation these few days

although things already happened but i've no idea about it

until probably a few centuries later

i need a personal secretary..

aaanyway

today i am so thankful for His arrangements

for so ngam to have transport to the places i need to go

and also a super short queue to take ID photos today

though the ups and downs of disappointment

I was called next to take photo although there were 2 other guys in front of me lol.

i have no idea why

i'm feeling wobbly today

emotionally

but after talking to one of my best friends

yes i do feel so much better now

thank you!

and above all, keep my hands lifted to Dad.

Daddy please help me be more conscious tomorrow.........

open my eyes BIG BIG

on fire!


we can be excited to talk about music with friends of common interest
or the latest fashion
or a newly-released movie 


but do we have the same excitement too when we talk about our God?


:)

Me and my God's battle.


I needed to hear this spoken.
I needed to see this written.




our past have certain ways to get to us
past hurts and memories might still have one of its hook clinging on our sleeves
it will not 100% leave us
though forgiveness and reconciliation has taken place
from the smallest thing that happens in the here and now
might bring back some bitterness 
and stings us right in the heart again


'ouch, see? this was what happened. you did this/ they betrayed you/ you cheated/ she lied/ he hurt you at that time of your life.
here's a little reminder of how that felt just in case you've forgotten. are you sure you can trust yourself/him/her/them again?'


the little tricks the devil tries to play in my head.


but the amazing thing is
when we've learned to forgive and let go of these incidents that once hit our lives so strongly
by seeing how our God had done the same to forgive us more than 2000 years ago
we realize forgiveness is not ours to give
it was paid with the high cost of Jesus's blood being entirely shed
so that we may be washed clean 
once again to connect with God.
because of love.
His love.
and nothing lesser.


how miraculously it happened!
how overwhelming His grace!
how He loves us.


when i find myself deep down in a dark pit again
dwelling on the lies and sin and condemnation of the deceiver 
I could look up and see the very proof of love itself
displayed proudly for all to see
for all to remember
for all to know
how our God loves us
how He has never wavered or moved
how His mercy and grace remains flowing abundantly
all from the things done on the cross
that took our place down in that pit.


with power coming from the inside
I find myself rising above my circumstances and gaining courage again
NO, i'm no longer condemned
NO, i'm no longer a sinner
YES, i'm amazingly forgiven
YES, i'm forever changed.


and how it changes the situation around is,
Strength and courage to forgive does not come from me
it takes so much to really let down that grudge or heal from that wound
but who we were and what we've done or what they've done
is ALL taken away by Jesus
and replaced with brand new slates for all who believes in Him
I depend on my God and put my full trust in Him and nothing less
He is my strength.
He is my rock.


The Everlasting.


"Even when I walk through the darkest valley, I will not be afraid, for You are close beside me. Your rod and Your staff protect and comfort me." Psalms 23

Do you know how big is our God?
do you even have the slightest idea?


it will blow your mind away
and you will resize yourself and God in your whole mindset
when you come to realization
who our God really is.


all that He had breathed life into,
created,
multiplied,
carefully designed,
amazingly crafted,
freely given,
constantly held on to.


us.
you and I
we are fearfully and wonderfully made,
down to the smallest cell in your body,
by this God who holds the entire GIGANTIC (it's not even close to describe it) universe
at the center of His palms.

Daddy the Amazing



He has been my great time planner all this while
ever so faithful
making sure everywhere i go and everything i do
is just, right in order and according to His timing
arranged my new sem timetable so ngam that i won't have class for this friday
knowing that we'll need to depart early in the morning for an upcoming church camp
I WON'T NEED TO SKIP!
i admit at first i was worried
but i was experiencing complete surrender unto Him
and He did what He always does
long before it needed to happen
and many many more events that took place these few days
that just went smoooth like butter


how can i NOT be joyous?!!! :D

Arrows pointing back to Him




when someone would say to me, 'Your song choices really connected in a smooth way that helped me connect with God'
i know it's not just me.


or 'The words you spoke just now really touched my heart'
i know it's not just me.


'I'm glad I came. I felt like I found back my love for God again. Refreshed.'
you know it's not just because of what we did.


but it's us + God
that created the setting where people could meet Him
that was able to reach into the depths of people's hearts and renew it.
that through us, God could minister to His children.
bring comfort and life


you will truly be deeply blessed when you act in faith.
and be used by God to bless the people around you the same.
:)

you is enough!

no one here for me.

no good grades in study.

no enough friends to hang out with.

no enough money.

no attention for me.

no good looks.

and many more no's

it's always so easy to think of what i don't have

and complain.

why like this. why like that!

but complaining is pretty unfulfilling

it can mean missing out to see the things Dad has already given me

and how i can multiply what i have and be grateful about it

what i don't have just seems puny standing next to it in comparison.

there's always things to be grateful about.

and yes they are enough

God, Your creator defines you

not the things you have and can do.

¹⁴ Do everything without grumbling or arguing, ¹⁵ so that you may become blameless and pure, “children of God without fault in a warped and crooked generation.”^[a] Then you will shine among them like stars in the sky ¹⁶ as you hold firmly to the word of life.And then I will be able to boast on the day of Christ that I did not run or labor in vain. Philippians 2:14-16

Worry what?

only starting a new phase of life a few days ago,

but even though i'm just a few days in i'm already experiencing Him greatly :)

He provided for me wherever i needed and had to go

miles before i even needed to go there.

just to point a few

He sent people to fetch me to quite a few destinations simply by divine intervention

something i seldom experience 

before i practice to give cheerfully and generously

and before i am putting all efforts to really want this change to happen

i'm sooo happy la :D

all this is just prepping me up to be more pumped to officially start my degree life!

great to count on a God that never lets you worry :p

just :)

i've been pampered and 'rejuvenated' both spiritually and physically today.

received a full of love facial from ah yooh

and got to be a part of an exciting upcoming project.

learned alot, saw alot, and ATE. ALOTTTT today.

:D :D

just. wow.

literally, bloated.

hahahah.

God is in the midst of it all, He comes to a prepared atmosphere :)

was dearly blessed.

just thought i'd pen this down.

after a notsolong day, GOODNIGHT BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE!!

Hearing Him on Mount Sinai :)



God's voice is not in the furious winds that split the mountain,
nor is it in the earthquake or the fire,
but His voice comes in a soft whisper.


when you set yourself there in a place and time for an appointment with Him,
just quiet yourself.
you will find Him
and hear His soft whispers.

O how great!

  C           F           G7         C
Great is thy faithfulness, O God my Father,
 F            C        D            G
There is no shadow of turning with Thee;
 G7            C           C            Dm7
Thou changest not, Thy compassions they fail not
F            C         G       G7  C
As Thou has been Thou forever wilt be.

CHORUS:
 G            C
Great is Thy faithfulness!
 A            Dm
Great is Thy faithfulness!
 G7         C             D       G
Morning by morning new mercies I see.
G7          C          C           Dm7
All I have needed Thy hand hath provided
F             C            G     G7  C
Great is Thy faithfulness, Lord unto me.

my day.


bus stopped at an unusual destination when coming back from kuantan today.
had to take a further, unfamiliar route back to pj.
hot and sweaty and heavily burdened.
came home.
hungry for food.
broke something that doesn't belong to me.
had to clean up the mess.
and pay back the owner.


hahaha.
at hindsight it really seems like things are just not going my way today.
still my heart was oddly joyful.
my steps were light.
my thoughts were fixed fully on Him.
knowing He was not leaving me alone in all that.
He sent me an angel to guide me along the way.
how wonderful :)


am actually in a secret spiritual warfare these few days.
he's striking me with his tactics
trying to knock me down
stop me from praising Him
giving me no reason to be happy


but i was still worshiping the whole way.
i was singing while mopping and walking and climbing up and down and getting lost.
in the midst of that all, my heart was at peace.


and how good it felt, to rest assure and just, praise Him regardless :)